Tuesday, February 08, 2011
Shan't shy away from ourselves. 

Have we started doubting our personal abilities and start thinking of alternatives to take over a duty that has a responsibility too hard to handle? (That's me actually) Become valuable to yourself and to the peers who look up to you or who might look for such assistance in the future.

HUGS <3

In any ways, congrats to my dear friend who was desperate at the last-minute in her search for someone to do an edit/review of her essay, because she was not one to do well in essays (and hence, she took this course). Well, we both had a hard time rushing out at the last 15 mins or so trying to cut down over 100 words :D Sure she had plenty of grammer and rephrasing issues (of lifted sentences from references), but it was all ironed out. Initially doubted that I helped her a lot as she exceeded about 40 words during submission, but she did the best I've ever seen her done (like borderline pass)! (: 34/35! omg! *SCREAMS* And truthfully, her essay was well-structured and that did make the grammer editing and reading so much easier. Think she has learnt a lot from this course, whether she believes it or not. An improvement that will deem useful in her future lab reports.

And this gave me the confidence of doing edits in the future for any one who needs help. Hahaha~ Or I will try. Won't say I'm the best, but I personally like essays that flow well to me.

I love them all~

There are many things left unsaid and they should just be left this way. Because everything will sour if it winds and heads in the wrong direction. Or we just don't want to take the risk. We ain't the kind to test waters that have cons that we dislike to deal with. Maybe it's time to take a step out and attempt to make the first move out from our comfort zone. What is there to lose, when life is just that short to live?

Gives a sense of protection and comfort.

Have been seeing myself heading out more often than I really used to, that I've taken aback plenty of peeps and even sometimes, my family. Shopping out with friends and now this... Lol, my parents are so ready to let me head out even though they aren't sure how protected I'd be. My new discovery: Mummy's definition of drinking = clubbing. What was she thinking? Shan't bother correcting her >< But she definitely know what spiking is. She trusts.

More than I can ask for.

Girlfriends for CNY! (: We went for the visiting during 3rd day of CNY after lunch to Huiwen's, Jean's and my place. Can't believe we gambled upon it. LOL! Still, it was successful, even if some of us were super shagged (: And Running Man has gone on to be the new addiction for all my cousins! Hahahah~ spread the love of Yoo Jae Suk and korean variety shows. We actually watched 3+ hours watching one episode after another, after we ate our steamboat dinner. I really love CNYs that are followed by weekends! Because that means our holiday breaks are sweeter and longer! And we can all stay even longer at my cousin's home to play and watch shows. Will remain this as one of my memories of CNY, before I miss 2 years worth of ang paos, catch up with cousins and friend gathering...

The feeling that will last as long I want to remember.

Jon is here for Chinese New Year visiting! (: Arriving on the second day of new year! Lots of places we are going as a family because of his arrival. Hahaha~ And I am now craving to go to Sentosa Flowers exhibit. But now I think about it, I don't feel like heading there any more. Because the flowers would be all faded out and wilting. Where's the joy in that? Besides that, we will also be pruning and all. Gonna be a fun week indeed! (:

'Cos it is special to me.

When we sit down and just relax. Enjoying ourselves to the fullest. Will we know how much we miss each other. The gals who make post-JC life memorable and special. Whether our actions have caused misunderstandings and unfavourable judgements on one another, at least we know we can be there for each other when we need one.

Complete disregard. ((:

Thanks everyone!

Friday, February 04, 2011
Happy Lunar New Year, everyone!!

I am going to trust my instincts and just stop right there (:
Trial and error on a delicate situation is just telling you straight in the face that you are simply playing your luck. Whether you are lucky or not is determined by the level of experience and judgement you set them out to be. With my take, I am going to soften the suspicion and just let things flow~ It's a matter of giving it up. Heheh.

This lunar new year is one event I will never forget and treasure it for the next 2 years to come. No one knows how much this long duration of separation and not meeting up regularly can change every single one of us. Sometimes no change is all good and well, but on the other hand, it just means that we have not matured in any way. Wouldn't that be a pessimistic picture? How about...we stay the same in character and personality but changed in our maturity, in better understanding ourselves. Hey wait, wouldn't that mean you have a different set of outlook of life?

Just merely mentioning - 2 years is rather short. It leaves you stumped for words. No one can really put into that person's shoes..how hard it is to be separated from a place that you dearly loved and spent most of your life in. Adapting? I have relatively accepted that life is just that fragile. Always changing and subjected to how optimistic and pessimistic you choose to look upon the situation. Pessimism is just seeking for trouble and all would say - digging your own hole. It is a simple sweet phrase we all tend to say. Practice what you preach. I believe it a lot. Friends I've encountered may miss their family loads in Singapore, embrace the whole truth and take it on themselves like it was their fault. Their sufferings that they have to leave their own comfort zone. But is it really worthy of you crying for half a year or a year?

Situational awareness. I have to work on this. I may be sensitive to a small extent. There are other things I have to sensitise myself to. Way more than what I perceive it to initially be. Takes courage to peek out of that shell. Chicken! :O

Tuesday, February 01, 2011
A reminiscence of what I imagined to be a small little living organism. I think I am stuck in a childhood illusion, with those bright little lighted flowers that float and shimmer in the darkness on the waters. The flowers' beauty that gets unfolded with each crease and curve. Isn't that a pretty sight to behold? (:

I've received a gift from Shirlyn, a dear primary school classmate of mine and it has proven to be a very inspirational read. And yes, I acknowledge my goldfish memory of mine. I will just post up the key ideas I've extracted from the book so far.

And two of which were to allow a child to develop their own sense of creativity whether it is to ask personally to paint his/her own room and to allow them to have a freedom of their own without restricting them much in what they really wish to do. The moral? To let a child continue his dreams, allowing him to let his imagination flow. Get him to believe he can do it. And then, I start wondering...what had caused me to hide inside my own shell? This shell that requires coaxing and adapting before anyone can see the real me. See what I truly want to do.

In the course of my life throughout these years toward my 21st. I've encountered several obstacles, which I've gradually relented and hence, accepted in my life. Obstacles which blinded me on every path I wanted to go. But to think of it now, even though I've been encouraging my friends to take this obstacle as a challenge and to weave their way around it, I for one do not practice what I preach. Instead, I've slammed myself onto this obstacle. Right smack in the middle. Not even a single part of my body was peeking out from this huge 'wall'. It is as if I've sacrificed my dreams, my inspiration to it. I've dreamt a dream, but I've caused it to remain as a dream..thinking that I will never have the capabilities to do so.

Will I be able to love the work I am doing? That's up to me. Will I love myself for being the person I am portraying. That's up to me. Will I love the listless life I lead because I refuse to break out from this person I am now letting others know? That's up to me.

And for this, I would really love to get back on my feet and tread through this difficult path...to uncover a different set of confidence, a new set of goals. And shed a part of my shell to show the style I would love to adopt ((:

If you have the will, there is always a way...don't they always say?
In my case, the will will be to create opportunities and open doors to improvement.